Sep 10

DDOJ-6 Christian Superstition Becomes Reality

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This is a true story that showed up in my facebook news feed a few months ago. I am doing this from memory so the wording is not 100% accurate – but it’s really close.

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Tired of all the Jesus posts on facebook? This is a new series called DDOJ (Daily Doses of Jesus). 

Each video will be a status I see on facebook, and a request for how you would respond in the comments.

Note: I will not be posting a new video every day. The word “Daily” refers to the fact that my friends post this stuff on their facebook statuses every day.

Opening Music is Bitter Sweet Symphony by The Verve

Transcript:
Welcome to the 6th installment of DDOJ – Meaning Daily Doses of Jesus – the series where I solicit the best responses for Obnoxious or just plain crazy religious posts that I see on facebook in an effort to plant seeds of doubt that help cure our Christian friends and relatives of their faith.

This DDOJ shows just how superstitious and socially irresponsible Christianity can make you.

Let’s get to it.

“The DEVIL is at work in our car today, and we need $400 to fix it. I am SOOOOOOO BUMMED but I know that GOD WILL PROVIDE! Jehovah Jireh ALWAYS provides for his children, and we know that ALL THINGS work together for the good of them who love God and are called according to his purpose!!!”

This just looks like typical Christian nonsense to me. I used to think like this when I was an indoctrinated child. Let’s look ahead to the next post.

2 days later:
“PRAYER WORKS! A few days ago we needed $400 to fix our car and GOD PROVIDED! We found exactly $400 in our mailbox this morning! I am so excited! PRAISE BE TO JESUS!!!”

Here is my response:

Do you really think your superstitions had anything to do with any of this? Your car broke down by some natural cause. The mechanic needed $400 to fix it. You went begging for it on facebook, and one of your friends was nice enough to bail you out. If Jesus really wanted to provide, then why didn’t he just fix the car magically?

Or maybe something shorter – like this:

Mooching off your friends in the name of Jesus? Hallelujah!